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You think you know of my struggles because its headlines were made public? You believe your battles are tougher than mine?

I had it easy, you say, never really had to go through what you went through? I’d gladly give you my past and present; show me how you’d master it.

You think you have me figured out because you know glimpses of my 31 years on this Earth?

It’s fascinating how some believe they have figured out my hardships, passed the verdict, and started sharing it too.

It’s mind boggling how some are capable of lying and deceiving just to purloin what rightfully belongs to someone else.

It’s sad how some can let go of certainty for the sake of uncalculated probabilities.

It’s frustrating how the most brilliant of minds can instantly be blinded.

It’s disappointing how disappointing people always turn out to be.

by Menna Gamal

Songs

I realized that every single song that’s close to my heart was a cry out. I can go months not listening to them and when I do I find a line that describes my exact thoughts.

The interesting thing is when I got hooked on them it’s usually for the melody and not lyrics, since it’s the first thing I notice.

Music is one of God’s gifts to us and at times they can express so much more than words.

by Menna Gamal

The inevitable

My therapist, who thankfully does not conduct my therapy sessions, once told me that I need to find someone who knows who I truly am, realizes my inner purity and honesty, and nurtures and protects them and not exploit either. He meant it in the romantic sense, and as truthful as this fact is, I feel I need it more on the friendship level than anything else.

I refuse to think I’m naive or weak. I may be incapable of cutting ties with people due to my fear of confrontation, but I know very well how to disappear, even if that’s considered cowardly.

All I ask is for people to treat me the same way I treat them. I ask for kindness and goodness. I ask for genuine care. All I ask for is fairness, even though fair does not exist. Life is not fair, and the faster I accept this inevitable, I’ll have less disappointments in life, people and relationships.

by Menna Gamal

Happiness

My happiness multiplies when people tell me that I do look happy.

It’s not that I’m seeking validation, but rather the fact that it proves what I always believed; I’m as transparent as they come. You can easily know if I’m ok or not. My face will always tell.

I’m proud that I’m unable to be fake or a two-faced bitch.

by Menna Gamal